Sometimes writing a blurb is harder than writing the actual book. The blurb is the little “description” that appears on retail sites and on the back cover of a paperback. It’s meant to attract readers to the story. Which… isn’t easy.
Back in the day, when I was working with publishers, sometimes I had to provide a book blurb, but sometimes the publisher took care of it. And even when it was my responsibility, the editor would often tweak what I sent in. But now, since I’m self-publishing, I’m the only one responsible for the blurbs. And I’m not great at them.
I keep finding myself trying to cram way too much information into my book blurbs. I end up with something that’s more of a synopsis. Which isn’t a horrible thing, but that’s not the purpose of a blurb. Although it’s taken me a while to get this through my head, the blurb isn’t supposed to summarize the story. It’s supposed to give just hints of the story and the themes and conflicts so readers will want to read the book itself and find out what’s going on.
When I wrote the blurb for Ebb and Flow, I was more intentional about what I was doing, and I posted it for feedback in a Facebook group I belong to that exists for the purpose of people getting feedback on their blurbs. I would say the blurb for Ebb and Flow is still far from perfect, but it’s much better than what I’d written for my other books.
Recognizing that, I spent the past couple-few weeks rewriting the blurbs for my published books. I struggled mightily with a few of them, while others just flowed pretty easily. As with the Ebb and Flow blurb, the new ones on my other books aren’t perfect, but they are better.
The one I think I’m proudest of is the blurb for Fill the Empty Spaces. That was one of the ones that just flowed, and I think it’s the one that’s the biggest improvement over the original. For comparison, here’s the blurb I originally 
had on Fill the Empty Spaces:
“Austin and Del were the love of each other’s life for two decades–until a drunk driver took Austin away. In his grief, Del leaves his job and pushes away most of his friends. Austin would want him to go on living, but how can he when Austin is gone?
In an effort to help, Del’s friend Remy books them an afternoon at a local cat cafe. There, Del bonds with Charlie, a senior cat who wears sweaters to cover his lost fur, and Lochlan, a human who volunteers at the cafe. On impulse, Del signs up to volunteer there too. Over time, with the friendship of Lochlan, Charlie, and the rest of the resident cats, Del starts to pick up his pieces and create a life without Austin.
As Del and Lochlan’s friendship deepens and Lochlan shares his deepest secrets, Del realizes he’s falling for the other man. He’s finally living again, but can he let himself love again?”
So… that blurb gives way too much summary of the story. Although the cat cafe and Charlie do play roles in the story, they aren’t really the major *parts* of the story, and so probably don’t belong in the blurb. And there’s no indication in the blurb that the story has a paranormal element.
When I had to republish all of my books due to accidentally deleting my Amazon account, I tweaked that blurb… but it ended up even worse, with even MORE TMI and details that didn’t belong in the blurb. The second version:
“Austin and Del were the love of each other’s life for two decades…until a drunk driver ended Austin’s. Now Del struggles to get through each day without his partner.
In an effort to get Del back into the realm of the living, Austin’s honorary sister Remy books an afternoon at a local cat cafe. A visit which changes Del’s existence. He bonds with Charlie, a senior cat with health issues who wears sweaters to cover his lost fur, and with Lochlan, a human who volunteers at the cafe. On impulse, Del signs up to volunteer there too. And with the friendship of Lochlan, Charlie, and the rest of the resident cats, Del begins to live again.
As Del and Lochlan’s friendship deepens, Lochlan admits one of his deepest secrets: He is a psychopomp, a human who guides spirits to the “crossing point” at the time of their death. In his need to understand Austin’s death, Del interrogates Lochlan, and Lochlan turns away from him. During the weeks of no contact, Del emerges more into life, and realizes, in Lochlan’s absence, that he is falling for Lochlan. When they finally reconnect, the sparks are there, but only a few months after Austin’s death, can Del let himself love again?”
Again, it’s more of a synopsis than a blurb. The nature of Lochlan’s deepest secret is meant to be a reveal, both to the reader and to Del, and yet here it is being spoilered in the blurb. And it’s way too long.
Now, here is the current version, the one I’m actually happy with:
“Everything was empty.
Not literally. My apartment was still filled with the remnants of my life with Austin. That was the problem.
The things were there. Austin wasn’t, and he never would be again.
Twenty years of love ended in an instant the night a drunk driver hit Del Nethercott’s partner Austin. In his grief, Del has pushed away most of his friends and is barely existing. Austin would want him to go on living, but how can he without the love of his life?
Over the next few months, Del finds his way into his new reality with the help of Austin’s drag sister Remy, a sweater-wearing cat named Charlie… and Lochlan, a man hiding a supernatural secret.
As Del works through his grief, he and Lochlan grow closer, until Del realizes he feels more than friendship for the other man. Only months after losing Austin, Del isn’t ready to love again. But maybe he’s ready to hope.”
Still not perfect. But a vast improvement, in my opinion, over the second version, and a pretty big improvement over the original. No spoilers, no TMI, and it isn’t a synopsis.
I’m still getting the hang of writing blurbs. But I think I’m getting there.
